Happy Birthday, Andrea Chickie!
Yep, it's Andrea's birthday and you know what that means.
You don't? Then we'll tell you.
On her birthday, Andrea gets up early in the morning and sings the Beatles', "Happy Birthday!" at the top of her lungs. If any of you have ever seen Andrea early in the morning. You know that's not a good thing. If any of you have ever heard her sing, you know it's a really, REALLY not a good thing.
For the rest of the day, Andrea demands that everyone she knows bring her cake. Preferably German Chocolate Cake with lots of pecans (her favorite). Still, it's her birthday so who's going to complain?
We would, but frankly, we're afraid of her. (We've heard her sing!!!!)
Still, we love our fellow chick and want to let you know a little more about her. So, we interviewed her.
Here's what our Birthday Chick had to say:
First act as Dictator for Life:
Ship everyone who talks in movie theaters to an island where they don't have any movie theaters. That'll show 'em.
What kids' lit character would you like to vote off the island?
Can I vote them onto the island with annoying people who talk in movie theaters?
Either way, I'd vote Pippi Longstockings off the island. Seriously. I know I can be banned from the Secret Society of Kids' Authors who Plan to Dominate the World. (And yes, there is such a society, but I obviously can't tell you about it.) But I don't care. If Pippi Longstockings was my neighbor, I'd get a doberman.
I really like her fashion statement and I love her anti-gravity braids, but honestly. She makes EVERY. DANG. THING. SEEM. SO. EXCITING. IT. MAKES. MY. BRAIN. EXPLODE!!!!!!
My runner up would be Amelia Bedelia. Because, while her character is lovely and she is kind and many good things, hearing the phrase Amelia Bedelia more than 200 times in a 30 page book is too much for me! Still, if Amelia Bedelia wanted to come clean my house, I'd be cool with that. I'd just pop in my earphones and crank some tunes on the old I-pod and ignore her. Ah. Bliss.
What kids' lit character would you share your last Twinkie with?
Winnie the Pooh because he'd probably share his honey with me. He's kind and gentle and oh so funny we'd have such a lovely time visiting friends in the Hundred Acre Wood.
What TV family would you like to be adopted by?
The Simpsons. I've never met a funnier family (except maybe my own) and anything is possible in Springfield. Plus, I look great in 2-D.
Worst job in the universe?
Picture taker at Sears Photo Gallery in the mall. Or hostess at Chuck E Cheese. Tough call.
Dream job for a day?
Broadway star. But I've been told very recently that maybe singing isn't my strong suit. Hey Chicks! You think I don't read this blog? Eh??? Just remember, my fine feathered friends. I know where you live!!!!!!
Marx Brothers or Three Stooges.
Marx Brothers. First and forever!!!! They are the smartest and funniest bunch.Masters of wordplay and slapstick. Smart and silly at the same time. I love them. Sadly, my daughter and I went out on Halloween a couple of years ago as Groucho and Harpo. And so few people had a clue who we were supposed to be! How sad is that? And no, we did NOT get confused and go as the lesser loved Marx Brother, Karl.
Clown V. Mime Deathmatch. Pick your winner.
Mime. Invisible box of death trumps big shoes every time.
Funniest dead person you'd like to meet.
The guy who invented Baba Ganoush. Anyone with mad naming skills like that had to be hoot!
Best use for a book-shaped object? A book-shaped object (or BSO) is one of those things sold as books but which should never ever EVER have been published. We've all seen them!
I think a BSO would make a great deadly weapon in a Bond film. Thrown frisbee-style from a helicopter, it could be lethal. And if that didn't work, it could simply be read to the victim!!!
Links to interviews for people who want to know other things about Andrea. Also good reading for insomniacs and people with lots of work to avoid.
Happy Birthday, Chickie. Here's a song to show just how much we care!